Often it is difficult for people to connect with others who are experiencing a life similar to yours.
I hope that by connecting you will less alone and isolated. Parents of children with special needs are often neglected with regards to self care. We forget to take care of ourselves. I believe that when we share our experiences with another person whose life is similar, hope spreads. In my experience, if I am not connecting, I fall apart. For me, it is an absolute necessity to connect with others. I need to know that others feel the way I feel. Otherwise, I feel isolated and become depressed.
I have 3 amazing sons. My oldest is a typical teenager and my younger two have Autism.
I know that you will all be at different places along this life long Autism journey. Some of you may have just started on this path. Others may be many years in. I have eleven years under my belt. I feel like I’m at a place where I feel my head is mostly above water. This, I am grateful for. I have perspective. Now it is a little easier for me to find hope because I have witnessed how far my children have grown. They have overcome many of the challenges that come with Autism. I have seen myself overcome challenges that come with being a parent of children with Autism. But I am realistic. I understand that bumps will always present themselves; some more difficult than others.
I remember when I started this path, I was terrified. I felt that I had been thrown out of space ship and I was just floating through out space not knowing which way was up. One of the many things I had wished for when I was told my sons had Autism, was a prescription for a set of moms, or parents who had many years experience in the world of Autism. These moms could be my crystal ball. They could tell me that everything will work out if you just trust yourself, find support networks, and hold onto hope. But I was too busy drowning. It was difficult to seek out help for me when I was busy trying to figure out how to help my children.
As a mother, I have overcome so much so far during this journey, but I know I still have much too learn. That will come with experience. But those raw emotions – the fear, the anger, the heartache, the grief- that show up after your child is diagnosed- they dissipate over time. I can not promise it will happen for you, but I can tell you it is possible, because it happened for me. Do these difficult emotions show up periodically? Yes, absolutely. But coping gets easier.
So, for now, I hope that by sharing the experiences I have had raising a very neuro-diverse family, it may help you to know that you are not alone. Connection is the key to help from isolating.